WATCH OUT FOR BLONDES

September 2, 1993

On the way to Tulsa, in a tiny little town,
By chance I saw my fuel had run low,
And so I slowed our Escort and began to look around,
Until I saw a Quick Stop, which seemed the place to go.

Other cars had stooped there too, and some with little care;
In front of me a Cadillac had left slight room for me to park,
But edging in just all I could, I came at last to where
Unleaded gas could be pumped like threading needles in the dark.

Alas, across the pump supreme there stood a gorgeous blonde.
She smiled and said, "Hello" just as my tank was full;
And then, as though with magic wand
Presided o’er the stunt I’d pull.

“Oh “ she laughed, “you’ve stopped my pump ",
And strode away to tell the clerk,
“I need a refund, for this chump
Put his nozzle in my pump - what a jerk!”

And so, my Friends, this lesson I have learned:
"Nothing makes an old man feel completely like a chump
So much as when his head is turned,
And finds his nozzle in the wrong pump.